The On/Off Switch

I’ve known for a long time that to successfully diet I have to switch my mindset into ALL DIET ALL THE TIME mode. I also know that if I try to lose some pounds without accessing the On/Off switch and setting it to On, I will fail. Here’s what the On/Off switch does:

When it’s set to ON, I can diet without much effort. I have absolute control over what I eat, and exercising makes total sense. I can easily ignore foods I shouldn’t be eating, even if you shove them under my nose. I have absolute control and I make the best decisions. I journal my food, and I track my exercise with ease.

When it’s set to OFF, dieting is an exercise in failure. I cheat with bits and bites of non-supportive food. I sabotage my own efforts, as I’ll take a little bit of everything (see, I think I’m dieting because the portions are small, but if I’m having some of everything it doesn’t matter how small they are) and fill up on foods with high-caloric density (just a little bit of each!). Exercising seems pointless and too much effort.

Here’s what I know about the On/Off switch:

  • I seem to have no control over when it gets hit. I can hope and wish that it will switch up when I decide to recommit to a diet and exercise program, but I can’t control it. If it doesn’t switch to On, then my efforts may keep me from gaining, but I won’t lose.
  • Even if it’s ON, small setbacks can flip it back to off, so I know that it’s important not to weigh daily when it’s on (shh, don’t disturb it, it’s doing its job!)
  • I can occasionally make it switch to on, but only by having a severe reaction to my own gluttony and a really high weight on the scale (basically, only if I’m disgusted enough with myself).
  • Lack of results will eventually switch it to off, if it’s on, without massive intervention and effort on my part.
  • Every time I’ve successfully lost any weight, the switch has been on.

I wish I had some control over the damned thing. Right now it’s set to on, and it has been since Monday. The best I can do is try to keep it that way as long as possible by staying on track, making the right decisions, and journaling. I have to ride this wave as long as I can.


3 Responses to “The On/Off Switch”

  1. beanolc Says:

    That is a fantastic analogy!

  2. jenny Says:

    Omg,this is so me too!!! Thanks for writing this I feel validated.

  3. Karla Says:

    I can soooooooo relate!!!

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