*Cue the scary music* I’m up 2 pounds today. pfft. Not too concerned. Last week I was down 2 pounds. See a pattern?
I do, but sometimes I have to work at it. Here’s the real pattern: When I’m up two pounds I think, “Oh my god, what if it just keeps going up and never goes back down and I gain it all back and oh no oh no oh no!”
And when I’m down two pounds I think, “Oh yes! I’m totally going to keep going down, and next week I’ll be down 2 more and then I’ll lose those 10 pounds I’m just sure I need to lose to be really happy…”
Right. This week I’m trying something new – I’m going to assume that the 2 pound gain means that I’m experiencing the normal fluctuations I’ve been experiencing for the last 8-9 years and that I am, in fact, maintaining my weight just fine. As I have been for the last 8-9 years.
Because the scale isn’t the problem in this relationship, it’s my scale anxiety and my ability to read whole novels into 3 little numbers. It seems that no matter what the numerical result, my mind can write a story to drag me up or down.
Scale management is about calming the mental stories and just letting the number be the number. This week the number is up, so I’ll be a little extra diligent in my efforts. Next week it’ll be down, so I may relax my vigilance a little, so that the next week it can be up. Wash, rinse, repeat.
Up. Down. Up. Down. Little fluctuations around an average I’m comfortable with. Learning not to freak out every time I weigh in. Still. Welcome to long-term weight management.